What a night!

by Anne

Last night the Pittsburgh Penguis rolled into the Staples Center to face the Los Angeles Kings.

The reigning Stanley Cup champs v. a team that hasn't made the playoffs in 25 years (figures estimated).

Both teams played a tight, close game through two periods. The Kings were outshooting the Pens, but the Pens took a 2-1 lead into the 3rd period.

That's when this game kicked into overdrive, the kind of overdrive that all fans (of the winning team, anyway) can enjoy: lots of goal scoring to clinch a victory. Not the overdrive where players just start beating the snot out of each other or anything like that.

No fights tonight, which makes me happy.

Anze Kopitar continues to dominate teams from all over the standings. He had another two goal night to up his season total to 13 and put some space between him and those trying to catch him in the scoring race.

The Kings also got goals from Wayne Simmonds, Jarret Stoll and Dustin Brown. They fired lotsa shots on goal, played with lots of speed, and shut down the Penguins top players.

This game, particularly the 3rd period was just what the Kings needed to really draw some attention to themselves on the East coast. They didn't do so well in their Eastern trip in October, and playing this well against the reigning champs sends a statement to the rest of the NHL.

Major props to the Pens post-game analysts who were full of praise for the Kings, unlike the Sharks analysts who ripped them apart when the Sharks were defeated by the Kings. Yes, the Pens were playing without Gonch, Geno, Talbot and Kennedy, but the Kings played them the way they should play a team that depleted. The Pens have been on the other side of that score many times so I'm sure this was unfamiliar territory for most of these boys.

This was the Pens first road loss of the season which is still pretty damn impressive.

Jordan scored the Pens first goal at 1:10 of the first period

Which was actually the second goal of the game as Kopi scored at :27 of the first

Greener didn't score, obvi.

But he had some good passes(!)

And was used by Craig Adams as a battering ram to break some glass.

The Canucks won last night by an identical score but the game wasn't as crazy and exciting because the Wild aren't very good at hockey.

Darcy Hordichuk of all people opened the scoring. Raymond scored, Henrik added a shorty, Matt Pettinger scored his first of the season and Burr added an empty netter to seal the deal. Andrew Raycrot has been solid in relief of the injured Roberto Luongo. Raycroft improved to 4-1 on the season. I picked him up on my fantasy team and all four of my goalies won. Sweeeet.

 

 Somehow, Kyle Brodziak scored two goals

Christian "The Hoff" Ehrhoff's crazy face shows his disbelief

Big Bear has the flu and didn't play. Poor Big Bear, I'll be right there with Cold-Eez, soup, tea and tissues. Never fear!

What a fantastic night of hockey it was!

AM/PM Fail

by Anne

Ed. Note: I wrote this post to publish this morning but it didn't. Whoops. I scheduled it for 8pm instead of am.

Tonight my #2 Eastern Conference team and my #1/#2 depending on the day Western Conference teams are playing each other.

I'm not quite as conflicted about this game as I am about when the Canucks play the Kings. Quite simply, my allegiance for the Sabres comes into play here and, because it will be better for the Sabres, I'd prefer it if those two points stayed in the Western Conference.

I don't give the Pens enough love on this blog, mostly because once the season starts it's hard to keep track of them and the Sabres at the same time.

I still love me some Pittsburgh Penguins and it can't be denied that they're probably the best team in the East, maybe the whole league, but Craig Anderson and the Avs might have something to say about that statement.

Anywhoozle, I don't want either team to lose, but as we all know, in the post-lockout era, that can't happen.

NO TIES FOR YOU!

I hope that they play a good clean game, both teams have lots of shots on goal and that there isn't a blowout on either side.

The Pens are dealing with injuries to Gonch and Geno while the Kings don't have any major injuries to speak of. Advantage: Kings

Jonathan Quick has played very well for the Kings this season, but Flower has been even better for the Pens. Advantage: Pens

The Kings have the league's leading scorer in Anze Kopitar, the Pens have Sidney Crosby. The Kings have Dewey and JJ3 the Pens have Letangarang and Go-Go boots. Advantage: Draw

It should be an interesting game, a chance for the Kings to test themselves out against the best in the East.

Rob Scuderi's first and only chance this season to take on his former team. The Piece is ready for business, I'm sure.

Ok boys?

Raitis: Just gettin' ready as per usual

Eric: Gettin' ready to play my type of hockey

Sigh. Ok, well at least my two favorite blondes will attempt to keep things running smoothly:

Greener hears my cry for sanity

Jordan's ready to keep things clean and happy.

Puck drops at 10:30pm EST (barf)

Team Canada is more interesting than Team USA

by Anne

Clearly I am an American citizen, having been born in New York State. Therefore I will be cheering for Team USA come Olympics time.

Yet, Team Canada boasts so many more players that I hold near and dear to my heart.

Sure Team USA has Miller, Kesler.... uhhhh and... ummmm David Backes? But Team Canada boasts such beloved favorites as Jarome Iginla, Rick Nash and Jordan Staal.

Must. Look. Less. Doofy. Than. Brothers.


The man can do no wrong


Nooo, please don't become a mountain man again, Nasher!
I'll adore you regardless but, pleeeeease?

If the sight of Derek Roy's photo didn't make me dry-heave, I might have posted it. However, as I cannot bear to subject you all to the grotesque eye-roll inducing portrait, I will leave it out.

There are, however, three portraits that cannot go un-ridiculed noted:

Dan Boyle will defeat the enemy with his Stink-Eye of Death


Tazer is only allowed out of the bell-tower to play hockey and stare uncomfortably at his opponents.


Vinny looks like he's about to puke and topple head-first into the camera
It suits him...?


A mutiny a-brewin', Lindy?


Marty St. Louis is horrified. Simply horrified.
He's just seen who his linemates are...


And its not these guys. They're Sid's wingmen
I love it.


What are the odds they're speaking English?


Adorable.

Proof that Marc and Jordan don't like Eric:


Jordan chills while a trainer... does something with Marc's ankles


Jordan: I'm gonna break Eric's stick
Marc: Ok, just make sure its really his and not mine this time, bro.
Nope, there are no photos of Eric with either of his baby bros. He must be a jerk.

That concludes my foray into the enemy's orientation camp. Not surprisingly, Team USA's stuff is not as interesting.

Stanley's Surprise Night On the Town

by Anne

There's a photo gallery up of the Pens surprising fans and taking the Cup around Pittsburgh this weekend. I, of course, decided to steal pics of my favorite Penguin acting goofy with the Cup:

As Mirtle said: "Don't drop the Cup, Jordan."


Friends! Pittsburghers! Non-countrymen!
Lend me your ears!
I come to drink from Stanley, not to drop him!
The evil that the Red Wings do lives after them
The good is oft interred with their bones;
So let it be with Crosby. The noble Lidstrom
Hath told you Crobsy was ambitious
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Crosby answer'd it.
....

Ok, maybe that's just what I think he was saying because I'm currently working on a production of Shakespeare's Julius Caesar and I'm a huge nerd. Also that speech would imply that Nick Lidstrom killed Sidney Crosby. Maybe that doesn't so much apply here.

However, if the Pittsburgh Penguins were the play Julius Casear, Jordan Staal would definitely be Marc Antony. Which makes Sidney Crosby Julius Caesar and I think that makes Nick Lidstrom Brutus and Chris Osgood, Cassius.

Most importantly: What the hell am I talking about?

While I feel I am safe in assuming Mr. Staal is under the influence of something a little more potent than adrenaline, in the entire gallery, he is not seen consuming alcohol. Also, Jordan appears to be holding the Cup in just about every group photo. Whatevs, I'm ok with it.

Yay! Enjoy it boys, you earned it.

Hockey is Bad for My Health

by Anne

I have documented proof that intense Stanley Cup Finals games are bad for my health.

Just as a test, before the game I took my pulse and BP (cuz my mom as a machine that can do it at the push of a button). Before it was 113/67 pulse 61. All low to normal readings. At the end of the game it was 139/88, pulse 96. Goodness gracious.

Pens win Game 6 by a score of 2-1!!

Lookityou!
Jordan gobbled up his own rebound on a 2 on 1 with Cookie Monster and opened the scoring!


Yay!!!


GRONK RAWR!

Rob Scuderi was the hero of the game, by far, literally diving into the play and preventing the puck from going into a wide open net not once but twice. He even made a nifty kick save in the game's dying seconds to preserve the win for his team. Tyler Kennedy scored about 5 minutes into the third and upped the score to 2-0. Kris Draper added his first point of the series and brought the Wings within one but that's as close as they got, thanks mostly to Rob Scuderi's heroics.

I'll be calling in sick to work on Friday.

As crazed as this series has made me, this is nothing compared to what it would be like if this were the Sabres. I would literally be unable to sleep or function normally until Friday. Godspeed, diehard Pittsburghers. I feel for you. Try to make it to Friday in one piece.

Game 7.

LET'S GO PENS!!!!!!!!!

Sidenote: I'm watching Trent Edwards' press conference and he's wearing a Sabres t-shirt. Awww. Feel the city unity. Also, the Bisons are horrendous. Ed Kilgore can't get over it on Channel 2.

What NOW?!

by Anne

So yesterday afternoon I asked for some Penguins heroics:

And Geno answered the call, three times over

An hour after the game ended, Twitter was still abuzz with Geno's heroics:

Malkin = bigger than Kobe

As did Chris Kunitz, Sidney Crosby , Max Talbot and Tyler "Fuggo" Kennedy and the Pens won game two of the Eastern Conference Finals 7-4.

The game was back-and-forth until Geno decided to quiet the B-Snaps down and scored his first ever NHL playoff hat trick. Can't let Sidney Crosby have all the glory, can we?

The tongue sticking out showz he's consintraytin'

The Pens take a 2-0 series lead into Carolina, where apparently, if you believe Butter Snaps fans, they will be completely obliterated and head back to Pittsburgh down 3-2, after only four games.

On the one hand I want the Pens to just take care of the Butter Snaps, but on the other hand, I want this series to go to seven games so I can drive down to Pittsburgh and watch the game outside with my wouldbe fellow Pittsburghers.

I suppose I could just wait until the Cup Finals to head down and watch them play Chicago*

Love

My new favorite Penguins bromance. Chris Kunitz and Jordan Staal:

OMG Chris Kunitz finally scored!


Love lifts us up where we belong



Dude, people are looking, let's go back to the bench for the post-goal-fist-bump parade



Yeah, Sid, I like you and all, but where's Gronk?



Hal Gill is a giant, and wants Chad LaRose to be well aware of that.

And finally, your obligatory "Jordan STAAL v. Eric STAAL OMG THEY'RE BROTHERS?!" photograph of the game:

Let's Go Pens!!

*(shhh, don't tell, I really think it'll be Detroit, but lots of 'Hawks fans read this blog and I don't want them to be more discouraged than they already are)

One Staal Staaled in First InStaalment While Other Staal is Staalwart

by Anne

That title has reached "Staal" critical mass. However, if I could think of another way to put "Staal" in there again, I'd use it.

Jordan defeated Eric in the opening faceoff circle and then his Penguins defeated Eric's Butter Snaps 3-2. Therefore, the Staal who wins the opening faceoff, wins the game, or something like that.

In spite of the bozos on Versus discussing Jordan's superior faceoff skills and Cam Ward's infallible infallibility, Eric won more faceoffs than Jordan and Ward let in some softies. Still, Cammo ended up having to do the lion's share of the work in net. The Hurricanes fired 12 shots on Flower in the first, and only 13 over the second and third. Yet, Flower still came up big and made some snappy glove saves and a few wild flaily "OMG Flower, just lay down on it!" saves. Now, they'll talk up Flower in the next pre-game and Ward will have the best game of his career and Flower will allow 5 goals on 6 shots.

Miro Satan's goal was a perfect example of capitalizing on the 'Canes poor transition game last night, along with Matt Cooke's "I meant to do that" blind dump out to the neutral zone that ended up springing Miro on the breakaway. Toss that in along with just about the niftiest fake we've seen from good ol' Satan since he left Buffalo where, in 2002, someone claimed he was on the verge of becoming an NHL superstar. Yyyeahhh... abouut that..

Anyway, bad news for the 'Canes as Tuomo Ruutu and Erik Cole both left the game with injuries with, of course, no news forthcoming after the game. The Penguins only injury question mark, Sergei Gonchar, played over twenty-one minutes, so that's that.

Even though both teams scored when they were "a man to the good" as Joe "Crazy Specs" Beninati would say, special teams weren't soo much of a factor. There were four power play opportunities for Pittsburgh versus only two for Carolina. Both teams did a decent job of staying out of the box. That, or the refs are just letting things go.

Now for your obligatory "Jordan STAAL v. Eric STAAL OMG THEY'RE BROTHERS?!" photograph of the game:

'
So much Staal

Game 2 is Thursday at 7:30!
Wooo!
LET'S GO PENS!

Just When I Think I'm Out...

by Anne

My first loves were never in the playoffs, my #2 team is gone, my #3 team has been golfing since February, that leaves the ex-boyfriend of hockey teams left to cheer for:

Max: Gronk, Anne's totally checking us out
Gronk: Hells yeah she is, we're all she's got left
Both (and Sid, behind them on the bench): Awwww yeah

So Pens, its true. I came crawling back. You were right. You always knew I couldn't stay away.

I mean I like the Blackhawks, I really do. I want them to win, definitely. I know they're in different conferences, but I need to start distancing myself now. On the off chance the Pens and Hawks meet in the Finals (highly unlikely but not totally un-possible), I will be cheering for the Penguins, I can't deny their appeal. The Pittsburgh Penguins were thiiiiiis close to being my hometown team, and I can't ignore that almost-love.

When people predict repeat Cup Finals appearances in October I always call them crazy and un-original. Up until, oh, maybe five days ago, I didn't think it was possible for a re-match. Remember how godawful terrible the Pens were for awhile in there? New coach, some roster moves and BLAMMO, here they are, one step away from the big dance.

As far as Game 1 against the Butter Snaps goes, the B-Snaps have Scott Walker's wife's cancer toooootally playing the media on their side. I wish Scott and Julie Walker nothing but the absolute best and a full recovery and health and happiness. However, I'd like Scott's season to end after this series... so he can take care of his recovering wife. See? My reasons for the B-Snaps to lose are toooootally coming from a good place. Totally.

For those of you who've missed the biggest subplot to the playoffs EVER EVER EVER, there are two bros playing each other in this series.

Ok, thanks, we get it.


No, really, we know they're brothers

For those who aren't sure how this whole "Staal brothers playing each other" thing plays out. Here's all you have to know:


Simple math.

LET'S GO PENS!

My Love For the Pens Gets to Shine for a Night

by Anne

Bored and avoiding writing an outline for a final paper, I decided to watch the Pens take on the Red Wings tonight, assuming the Wings would make short work of the injury-riddled Pens. They suffered more woes as Rob Scuderi went down after taking a Lidstrom slapper off the ankle and Kris Letang was unaware of the "you're trying to STOP the other team from scoring" fundamentals of the game. The Pens were behind most of the game until Jordan Staal said "You know what? Screw this." and scored a hat trick to send the game to OT.

WHOA. That game was INTENSE. I joined the Puck Daddy live chat and it was pretty awesome, not gonna lie. I needed some intense hockey to lift my spirits with this lengthy break between Sabres games.

Jordan Friggin' Staal. Earlier in the night some jokers were talking trash about him, saying how he's been awful this season and then, look at that- a hat trick to shut them all up.

Rarely do games like these live up to their hype, but this one did just that and more. It was like a perfect metaphor for last season's cup finals: The Pens were outplayed and generally lackluster to start, but turned it up and gave a good run at the end, only this time, they WON.

WOO!!! Its not often I can get that worked up about a game in November that does not feature the Buffalo Sabres, but I was back in the playoffs again, living and dying on Jordan Staal's goal production.

This was the kind of game we were expecting from these two teams in the Finals: intense, fast, passionate, and high-scoring. If you recall, the Pens were shut out in the first TWO games of the Finals last season, causing Gary Bettman to weep openly at the one-sidedness of it all.

For those who might not be aware, the Pens rank a distant (but still beloved) 2nd in my hierarchy of favorite hockey teams, so I greatly enjoy watching them play, except when they beat the Sabres.... which I think they did 4 out of 4 times last season. Booooooooooo. I try not to take it personally.

Anyway, that game was totally wacky and I loved it. NOW, if only the Sabres can deliver up as much moxie tomorrow, I'll be a happy camper.

Woooo!

And the Winner is..../Weekly Poll

by Anne

So when I set up that last poll, I didn't anticipate the LANDSLIDE victory that it was, hahaha. I try to make it possible for it to be more even. This was not a good example of that, lol.

The question was:

Quick! The babysitter canceled! Which of these players do you call?

Your choices were:

Danny Pie-YAY
Alexander Ovechkin
Marty Biron
Jaroslav Spacek
Jordan Staal

So, tied for 4th were:

Alexander Ovechkin and Jordan Staal

If you don't want your children to do this, don't call either of these boys. I have a sneaking suspicion that all your children would learn from these guys would be the perfect spitball making technique, honed over years of practice.

In 3rd place:

Jaroslav Spacek

I don't exactly understand why more people don't want a cubic Czech man screaming at their children. I voted for him, as did my sister. Come on! Who doesn't want their children to live their lives with the patented Jaro "SHOOT PUCK SCORE GOAL WIN GAME" mentality?

In 2nd place:

Only a few people wanted Danny Paille to bring his ice cream man into your home. I'm sure he would teach LOTS to your kids about Perry's... and... uhhh how to put your shoes on the correct feet? I'm not 100% sure that Pie-YAY has managed to figure that out completely, so while I'm sure he's an excellent role-model for your children, he may not be able to keep track of them if "Bob the Builder" suddenly comes on TV.

The winner by a LANDSLIDE, and perhaps because he seems to have the same attention span of most children, perhaps because he has his own children, the winner:

Marty Biron

I'd want Marty to take care of my children as well, I'm sure. He'd probably talk non-stop about whatever comes into his stream of consciousness brain which is something they could probably relate to. Children are probably the only human beings that possess the verbal fortitude to rival Marty. It would seem that the parents and future parents of America value Marty's sweet nature more than the iron-fist rule of Jaroslav Spacek.


Ok so this week's poll isn't exactly "racy" but it's a little bit more PG-13 than last week.

The question is:

You're drunk and stranded in downtown Buffalo and your friends have deserted you. You only have enough battery to call one of these people. Whom do you trust to not take advantage of you in your drunken state, but secretly hope that they will?

Jason Pominville
Steve Bernier
Pat Kaleta
Mike Ryan
Nathan Paetsch

EDIT: Ok, so, no, Goose isn't on the list. The reason being that I knew everyone would pick him. So for the purposes of this post let's say Goose is off in Europe with Millsey, which he actually is as of this writing. Woo! They're meeting up with Jaro and Kotalik in Prague! HOW CUTE! CAN I BE THERE?!?!

Go On Without Me, World

by Anne

Alas, I toil away in Pennsylvania. Babysitting the cousins, attending a memorial service, acting as chauffeur, all that good stuff.

My Buffalonian blood is not used to this kind of heat and humidity, I swear it hasn't been below 80 the entire time we've been here, day and night. God bless central air. Glorious, glorious central air. I challenge anyone in Buffalo to name 3 people they know personally who have central air in their home. Yeah, that's what I thought. We're about 100 miles north of the Mason-Dixon line, and you can feel it. Yuck. Heat is gross.

I love that, all of a sudden, now that they've lost, everyone is just NOW starting to obsess over the fact that this young team of Penguins stars, will, shockingly, not all be together for eons to come. Duh. I mean, did all hockey writers just collectively choose to ignore this fact?

Much like Y2K, any idiot could've seen this coming.

Do you think they have enough cap space for Marc-Andre Fleury, Evgeni Malkin, Jordan Staal, Ryan Malone, Marian Hossa and Sidney Crosby? Not unless they all take ENORMOUS discounts, I'm guessing at least 1/2 of that list will not be Penguins very soon. It's just not possible. Gronk's entry level contract will be expiring soon, as will Geno's. Buh-bye to at least 1 of them. Gronk will be cheaper, although, we'd DEFINITELY take him in a Sabres' uniform, if you're finished with him, Sid.

Is it weird that for some reason, I really want the Sabres to draft Jared Staal? It's like we'll be part of some fancy exclusive Eastern Conference club. We'll totes be in the in-crowd. AWESOME.

Then again, I'm not sure I'd want to hear raunchy stories about the babiest of the Staal's getting his swerve on in the bathroom at Bada-Bings.

Sidnote, that picture of Zetterberg drinking out the Cup on NHL.com is creeping me out beyond words. Please, take it down.

Everyone needs to sit down for this announcement. Get ready, I know we'll all be on the edge of our seats:

On Tuesday (6/10) at 1:00 p.m. the Portland Pirates are having a press conference to announce their new NHL affiliate.

OOOH! OOOH! PICK ME! PICK ME!

I bet it's Buffalo! Don't ask me how I know these things, it's a gift.... or its because, somehow, EVERYONE HAS KNOWN FOR MONTHS THAT THEY'D BE OUR NEW AHL TEAM.

I mean, COME ON. Anaheim has even announced that they're new affiliate is in Des Moines. Little closer to Anaheim will probably make call-ups a little easier.

It was probably so nice for Darcy when our team was less than an hour's car ride away, now... not so much.

Who wants to go to Portland and watch a game?!?! Maybe they'll play the Amerks and we can go and check 'em out this season. Who's with me?!?!?

Back to civilization tomorrow! Woo!

And the winner is....

by Anne

In our first Weekly Poll, we asked you which of the Staal brothers was your fave.

The choices (duh) were Eric, Marc, Jordan and Jared.

The boys ranked as follows:

#4 Jared (5%)

I'm not surprised Jared came in 4th out of 4. Why? Because we know almost nothing about him because he's only 17 and not yet in the NHL. Give it time, I'm sure someday he'll be more than 1 persons favorite Staal.

Doesn't he look like Phaneuf in this picture?:

Marc (L) Jared (R)

#3 Eric (11%)

Since this IS a Sabres blog and Eric and his 'Canes gave us our playoff walking papers in the 2006 ECF, I'm not surprised he is not overly beloved by Sabres fans the blogosphere over. I'm actually surprised he got more than 1 vote.

The Staal Brothers <3 pinstripes... because they need to look taller...?

#2 Marc (27%)

My personal favorite underrated Staal. He's pretty sweet. He was the OHL's defenseman of the year last season. Wooo! Ok, I know its tough to love him because he plays for the gross-tastic Rangers. However, he didn't CHOOSE to be a Ranger, they DRAFTED him. I, of course, understand Eric was drafted by the 'Canes, but WHATEVS. Marc is described as the family goofball, and I love me a goofball. I also actually kind of feel bad that his younger brother started in the NHL before he did. But he's still more awesome. Marc's "Girlfriend" page has like absolutely nothing but pictures of him and Jared. He might have a girlfriend named Danielle from Sudbury (or Sudberry as they spelled it), or Casey from Quebec or I don't care from I still love him anyway. The best part is really the people who post things like "WHAT VOODOO MAGIC DO YOU HAVE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO KNOW THIS INFORMATION?!?!" He's also a rockstar.

See?:

#1...by process of elimination Jordan (55%)

Jordan is quite popular amongst Sabres fans, apparently. I would assume most Sabres fans don't really find the Penguins terribly offensive and Jordan has the distinction of being really young and pretty hot. He is my 2nd favorite Penguin...maybe 3rd. Well done, Jordan. You are well-tolerated by the readers of this blog. Maybe its because he's the biggest Staal bro. They're all the same height but Gronk is 15 pounds heavier than each of his NHL playing brothers. Well done? I really would love it if Jordan could find his scoring touch again next season and have more goals than his big bro. He's def going to have more goals than Marc...ok, if he doesn't though, either Marc is playing out of his mind or Jordan has lost his.

Jordan on a lake lookin' super chill

I'd love to know the reasons why people chose the Staal brother they chose, so post 'em.


OMGAH, I'm pretty sure I keeled over and died when I found this picture. Thank God I came back to life in time to finish this post:

Eric Staal: Supreme Smiley Living Room Overlord
Jordan looks like an albino elf and Eric seems to be attempting to crush his head
Marc is his usual chill self
Jared is SO over this picture

Be sure to take this week's poll:

Favorite movie in which the main focus was a hockey team; aka, not Happy Gilmore.