I Hate/Love Oversleeping

by Anne

I enjoy oversleeping when the thing I'm late for/missed is not important, like class.

Last night was not the greatest for my beloved boys.

The Phillies won, which means the Rays lost. BOOOOOO!!! Ok, I didn't pay attention to them from spring training until the other day, so CLEARLY the pressure of my love's focus on them was too much for them to handle. Sorry, Tampa Bay! I'll work harder at caring less next season!! But, I mean COME ON, who in their RIGHT MIND would've thought that the Tampa Bay Rays, with my boyfriend, Evan Longoria, would even have a winning season, nevermind making it all the way to the big show. That's pretty impressive, boys. Now, if you could make sure none of your "RAWR, WE'RE SO AWESOME" juju wears off onto the 'Bolts, we in Buffalo would appreciate it, thanks.

The Pirates lost a painful one in Hartford. They wwwaaaayyy outshot the Wolf Pack but the Pack's goaltender, who has a lot of "i"s in his name, played really really well. Gerbe Derby got his 6th goal and stood up to a bigger dude who was giving him a hard time. Grrrrr, you tell 'em Nathan! We're still 4-1-1, so its all good.

The Stars won, which probably feels good for Dallas fans. HOWEVER, my Stars' WCB, Marty Turco, was NOT in net. He was getting a much needed night off. Dave Tippett still has mad love for Marty, and knows that during a game is not the best time to figure out why you're not playing your best. Well done Tobias Stephan... whoever you are. But I still wish Marty had gotten the W.

BUT! That means the Stars handed the Wild their first regulation loss, WHICH MEANS, we were undefeated in regulation longer, so SUCK ON THAT, Minnesota. I mean, I love you, Owen Nolan.

Anaheim continues their winning ways making it 5 wins in a row with a 5-4 overtime victory Detroit. Teemu had a hat trick and GETZY HAD A 5 POINT NIGHT (0+5)!! Yayyyyyy!!

You can't keep a good man down, PAVEL



Henrik: Brad, you have something on your face, I think its an eyelash. Here.
Brad: What? Go away.
Henrik: No, really Brad, let me get it, its right there.
Brad May: Hank, its fine, I'll get it later

Anyway, I hope the Sabres don't take for granted the fact that the Lightning are basically Vinny Lecavalier and Mike Smith. Hopefully TV will be able to bust out those mad hat trickery skillz he used last year. Muahahahhahaa.

Ryan Miller in Your Bedroom...

by Anne

For all you ladies.... or gents, (whatev) who have ever wanted to get Ryan Miller alone in your room, now you can!!

How about Marshawn? Bruce Smith? Jim Kelly?

I know what one I'M getting... AWWW YEAH

As TOTALLY BADASS as it is that we're atop the WORLD right now, HOW AMAZING IS IT THAT MY LONGSHOT FAVORITE TEAM, THE TAMPA BAY RAYS HAVE TIED THE SERIES AT 1-1.

For those who don't know, while bored on Easter, I decided that I was going to start following baseball over the summer and set off to pick the most random HOT MESS of a team I could find.

The fact that they'd never had a winning season, the team was known for bench clearing brawls and the fact that they had just decided to change the team name like half an hour before I began my search lead me to the Tampa Bay Rays. AND NOW THEY COULD WIN THE WORLD SERIES. HOW RIDICULOUS IS THAT???

FURTHER PROOF THAT MY LOVE CAN MOVE MOUNTAINS.

Also, apparently the Sabres don't live and die based on who gets the pigeon? WHAT?!

From TV's blog:

The media have made some fuzz about our lockerroom “pigeon”. There’s really not that much about it. It really started out as a joke. I don’t even know who recived the bird after the Boston game. For us it’s just a gag.

Pssshhhhhh you know he's only saying that because he's trying to put up a strong front for when he doesn't get it and he's all weepy and upset and Ashley has to give him one of their son's stuffed chickens to calm him down.

I still miss Goose :( and Yoyo :( and Craigory :(

Ryan Whitney's Playoff Beard is Crying

by Anne

It's chestnut, it's auburn, it's red, its blonde. Ryan Whitney's playoff beard has the makings of one of the greats. This is the first time we've gotten to see it go the distance. I'd like to see it come back again. However, not at the expense of the Sabres. Never. Although... if he became a Sabre....

Whatev. They gave it a good go. It's not over yet... buuuuuut.....yyyyeeeahhh.....

Onto my new love: totally obscure baseball teams whose successes and failures have no bearing on my well-being.

Tampa Bay won 2-0 today. Woo. Suck on THAT, White Sox.

Scott Kazmir set a club record with his 5th win in the month of May. His ERA is now 1.22 which was described in one article as "astonishing".

Here's what I've learned: I know "wins" are "good" and a record number of "wins" means you play "well" so, since his ERA of 1.22 was mentioned in the same breath as "record" and "wins" and not as in "in spite of his 1.22 ERA", this leads me to believe a low ERA is "good" and that 1.22 is "low". I'm a genius. They have one pitcher with a 6.14 ERA, I'm guessing that's "bad".

They are STILL atop the AL East, 1 game ahead of Boston and now 6 games ahead of the Yankees who've moved from 5th to 4th.

I found a site that explains baseball abbreviations. For example "SO" does not mean "Shut Out" it means "STRIKE out" and "TP" means "Triple Plays" not "Toilet Paper". Look out, baseball world! Soon I will have a vague pedestrian understanding of the way you list your statistics! Then I shall be unstoppable!!! Muahahahahhahah!!!

First Stephanie from Top Chef, now the Rays. Looks like things I choose to throw my support behind for no good reason tend to excel. I should move away from Buffalo and pretend I've never heard of hockey, and start supporting the Sabres, maybe that'll help.

Back to hockey, briefly:

I realized last night that I'm secretly glad that the Penguins are losing.

Ok, ok, hear me out, PensNation.

For me, their downward slide is more annoying than catastrophically painful. It doesn't carry the same gut-wrenching agony that a Sabres loss provides. Therefore, it merely serves as a somewhat unpleasant reminder of where my heart truly belongs.

So, Sidney, while I'm sorry you more than likely will not be hoisting that Cup later this week, I'm not sorry that you've help to set me back on track earlier rather than later. Sorry, Sid! You'll get there someday, I'm sure of it. Love ya!

Forget Hockey

by Anne

Ok so, hockey is so done for me.

It's all about my new love:

Terrible baseball teams that do well all of a sudden.

Easter Sunday I decided to throw my full summertime support behind the Tampa Bay Rays.

This is now a blog dedicated to the Tampa Bay Rays.

Tampa has finished no higher than 4th (out of 5, and that was only once) in their entire 10 season history.

They are currently atop the AL East, 1 game ahead of the reigning World Champ Boston Red Sox, 6 games AHEAD of the YANKEES. They actually have the best record in all of Major League Baseball.

EPIC, I tell you. EPIC.

Let me also emphasize that other than a few choice terms like "RBI" "Home Runs" "Wins" "Losses" and "Batting Average" I know almost nothing about baseball. (What in GODS name is an Earned Run Average?)

I have no idea what a "split" is, and no clue what any of those abbreviations stand for. Why does a baseball team have so many pitchers? Tampa has twelve. TWELVE?!?! Is that really necessary?

I will now have an "Anne's Favorite Ray" contest. Considering I can't name a single one, this process will probably be very short.

Nevermind, after one perusal of the roster list, I've declared my favorite:

EVAn LONGORIA

How can you NOT love a DUDE whose name is EVAn LONGORIA?!?!

And he's my age. It's fate.

How can you not love someone who looks like this after being drafted 3rd overall in 2006?

And this season is his first. AND he made his debut on my Dad's birthday. I mean, COME ON! FATE.

He plays 3rd Base.

He's got 7 Home Runs so far. I think that's good?

He has a slugging percentage of .460........ Woo? I have NO CLUE if that's good or bad.

Is this a joke?
This is how you figure out someone's slugging percentage

Apparently .500 is good, sooooo .460 is ok? I'm not joking when I say I have absolutely no idea.

At this point, he seems to be an average player. But its his first season, so it's ok... I guess?

MY GOD THERE ARE SO MANY STATISTICS AND ABBREVIATIONS. HOW CAN ANYONE FOLLOW ALL OF THIS?

He hit a double in the 9th inning the other night, and gave the Rays their 4th walk-off win of the season (???????)

Whatev, all I know is that EVAn Longoria is destined to be one of the greats in my mind. Why? Cuz I'll have no idea if he's any good or not.

Awesome.

Even though I know so little about baseball, I will say that one of my favorite things to watch in any professional sport is to watch a baseball player throw a ball really really far, really really fast. It's really impressive.

---

Dear Pittsburgh Penguins:

Screw. You.

Anne

Uhhhhhhh

by Anne

Red Wings 4 - Penguins 0, Detroit leads series 1-0.

Yuck.

So after 2 periods of some pretty excellent defensive play, we were finally treated to that offensive bonanza we had been promised for so many days. However, the only team "bonanza-ing" was the Detroit Red Wings. The Pens just seemed stunned. Grrrrrrreeeaaaaat. Getting shut out is not cool. Not cool at all. We're gonna chalk it up to nerves and an unfamiliar building and call it a day. A very frustrating, painful, irritating day.

But! We don't give up! We soldier on! Monday night they have a chance to redeem themselves. I don't care how many stats they pull out about the winning of the first game stats. They aren't out of this thing yet. Not by a longshot. As The Pensblog pointed out, if you picked the Pens to win in more than 4 games, they're gonna have to lose a couple along the way. It's ok. Don't worry.

---

Private to Marc-Andre Fleury:

Flower, you're still ok in my book. People will mock you for face planting whilst entering the ice for the game, I personally appreciated the humor of the moment. I was probably the only one that wasn't a Red Wings fan who enjoyed it.

Please try to stay on your feet more often, and keep your mask on.

Love,
Anne

---

Private to Sidney Crosby:

Your long curly locks, creepy facial hair and awkwardly tan Miami Vice-style suit should have repulsed me. However, for some reason, they endeared you to me. I still don't love you, but the fact that I can overlook your obvious poor grooming choices at the age of 20, means we're on the road towards real HockeyLove. Now, if you could please score some of those goals you're so DREADFULLY fond of, I'd appreciate it. Hey, I'm not picky, you can set up Hossa or Dupuis. You can even set up Gonch or Bugsy or Geno on the PP if you want to get fancy. My love has put the Tampa Bay Rays at the top of their division, I think it can do the same for you.

Did Steve Yzerman make you nervous? Was it Unkie Mario? It's ok, Sid. You'll pull it together. Let's be honest, if anyone can, you can.

Love,
Anne

---

Private to the Tampa Bay Rays:

I picked you as my baseball team over Easter weekend when it was made apparent that there was no hockey played over the summer; a fact I forget every April. I picked you because I liked your logo and, as MK put it "This team sounds like a bunch of dirty crooks." Multiple bench clearing brawls? Domestic battery charges? This sounds like my kind of team. That, and they suck.

You're only 1/2 game behind Boston for the AL East lead. The same division that now sees the monster Yankees in 5th.

I'm taking all credit for your successes. My love can move mountains. All I really wanted was your first winning season it team history, and you've taken my request and just run with it. Thanks. That's very sweet of you. I still can't name a single one of your players. I'll work on that. Maybe Vinny and I can go to one of your games and laugh about how if a team as bad as the Rays can turn it around, surely the Lightning can do the same next season. We'll share a soft pretzel and start the wave. It'll be sublime.

Love,
Anne