Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Together At Last! Together Forever! We're Tying a Knot They Never Can Sever!

by Anne

Oh Joy of Joys! Are our hearts so lucky? Correction, is Drew Stafford's heart so lucky?

NJ.com reports that Zach "All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth" Parise will be playing for Team USA in the World Championships. Wa-hoo!

Lest we forget, and as I like to mention ALL THE TIME. Staffy and Zachary were on the Team USA World Juniors team that brought the USA its first and only gold medal in 2004. Wooooo!

Look at that smile! :(

Also, next to Zachary in that picture is Patrick O'Sullivan, also on Team USA 2008. Hot. Stuff. I'd heard rumor that Paulie Martin of the Devils would be playing as well. Confirmation please? You only have until Thursday to report to camp! Now that the Bruins are out, think Yicky Phil Kessel will represent his country? I may not like him but he's good and he'd probably help out the team. Ewwwwww I don't want to cheer for Phil Kessel...it's kind of short notice to go to Maine for Phil. Although the only team he could play for that would be closer is the team that ousted him. OHHHHHHHHHHHHH SNAP!

Seriously though? WHY ARE THESE PRACTICES IN MAINE? Granted, I'll be working until like the 2nd last possible game of the tournament, but WHATEV, it doesn't matter. How can this team of American Hotness be so far away? So what if its like the first time ever that the Worlds are held in North America and they could be in Finland or something...whatevs!

All of this extracurricular playoff hockey viewing has opened my eyes to a whole world of hotness heretofore unexplored. Our roster of All-Star hotness will definitely be getting at least a partial revamping for next season. Owwwww! Maybe we'll finally get around to making that roster of All-Star Fugness. That one isn't as much fun to make. Who wants to sit around and compare ugly hockey players? I'll pass.

On the Sabres front, the issue of acquiring a new backup goaltender is being raised. Most believe that we will not keep T-Bone. Who's available? Valiquette? Huet? Is he really back-up material? Dan Ellis? same for him. I don't see either of those guys playing 2nd fiddle. I do like Dan Ellis though. He's one of those feel-good stories about the guy who nobody wanted, then lead his team to the playoffs and won 2 games against the monster Detroit Red Wings. Ok, there's also Ray Emery but that won't happen so I won't even talk about it. I'm pretty sure Ray Emery needs to peace out of this division. Is Raycroft available? He did win the Calder. I'd take him over Emery any day.

Tonight will be an excellent night of hockey. Two of the most physical series of the playoffs both go to Game 7 tonight. Woop!

Sidenote, I laughed really hard at Don Cherry's comments about the Wings/Preds series. He said he was amazed that that many men could skate around the ice for that long without bumping into each other. Haha, I didn't watch much of that series, but I'm guessing it wasn't very physical. I don't like the Red Wings. I don't hate them or even really dislike them, they're just a bizarre team. No joke, everytime I watch them in their fugly uniforms I feel like I'm watching a classic game from the 1970s.

Go Caps! Go Flames!! WOOOOO!! AO!! GREENER!! J-ROME!!

1 comment:

  1. Yay for Zach and Staffy!! Since one of my favorite pairs of hockey BFFs (Pommer and Goose) are being torn apart by a sports hernia, at least one of our boys can be reunited with one of his best friends!! And maybe now he can find someone who can tolerate that sleep-snuggling thing...

    I, too, can't wait for hockey tonight...I actually worked ahead on a major paper I had to do just so I could watch the games (is that pathetic??). Go Ovie and Iggy!!


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Glossary... Sort of

  • "Ryan Miller Shutout" - A 58 minute, multi-goal shutout lead that is blown when Miller allows one meaningless goal
  • Britney or SabreBritney - Thomas Vanek
  • Butter Snaps - Carolina Hurricanes. Because Butter Snap pretzels, like the Carolina Hurricanes, are disgusting
  • Greener - MATT Greene (LAK)
  • JBG - Jolly Blonde Giant - Tyler Myers
  • Little Foot - Drew Stafford
  • MK - Anne's sister; often leaves nonsensical comments under her Twitter name Mmmkizzle
  • Oscar - Anne's cat

Because it's never not funny

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